Veep, veep! Veep, veep!

That’s the sound of the veepstakes clown car; every few seconds, some fresh clown steps out, unfolding and setting the crowd to clapping and chattering, and all the while the car horn sounds, “Veep, veep!”

Yeesh. Today’s clowns are Kathleen Sebelius and Mike Huckabee, the latter causing far more cheering and veeping din than the former. If our traffic meter is any gauge, the Huckster and his so-called army are going to continue to make a bunch of noise all the way to the Republican convention, demanding the veep slot until assuaged.

Don’t ask me what “assuaged” looks like in this “with us or agin’ us” internecine squabble between the social conservatives and the fiscal conservatives within the Republican Party. The fiscal conservatives are just as piqued about Huck’s Army’s excessively zealous demands as the Hucksters are about not getting their way with a presidential candidate, and there’s no indication that a compromise is in the works.

On the other side of the political aisle, there’s rampant chatter about a handful of veep candidates. The Obama campaign could easily be messing with their constituents with visits to Indiana and Virginia, spawning alternating freak-outs among the anti-Evan Bayh and anti-Tim Kaine factions. There’s the Wesley Clark option that sets the netroots of the Democratic Party into a frenzy whenever his name comes up as a possible candidate.

And then there’s Kansas’ Gov. Kathleen Sebelius. Quiet, effective, well-liked — obviously not an option, right? Can’t possibly have this much change on a ticket all at one time; the country would spin out of control if a man of color and a woman were offered up as a leadership team. That’s where the Buts come in …but Sebelius is now touring the country to campaign for Obama, as if trying out for the veep slot. She’s going to be in Michigan today and in Iowa on Thursday for multiple stops, as our sister site points out, pondering the idea that this might be an audition.

The odds are certainly looking stronger for Sebelius if futures traders are rational indicators.

Who knows; we have another month of this clown car, even if Obama makes a rumored announcement about his selection inside the next few days. Look out, here it comes now: Veep, veep!! Veep veep!!